Stephanie Krellwitz
Self-Portrait: Z and Me
watercolor
5.5 x 3.5 in.
NFS
My recent portraits have focused on the relationship between mother and child, inspired by my own experience with motherhood, which, along with everything else, has been impacted by quarantine. My painting approach uses the softness of watercolor and the play of light through color to translate my feelings into images.
I first learned of the concept of feeling “touched out,” while pregnant and wondered how anyone could feel that way. I loved daily snuggles with my husband, and later adored the constant holding and nursing of my baby. Now that my daughter is 19 months old, co-sleeping, still nursing, and constantly asking to be picked up while I have little access outside help due to the safer-at-home order, I officially get it. There are days where I want nothing more than to just be alone, to have my body and mind back for just myself, even if it’s just for a little bit. But then, my snuggly (and as of late, often grumpy) toddler will hug me, kiss me, and fall asleep in my arms. I surrender to the present, listening to her breathe and feeling her warm, not-so-little body against mine. Ok, My Love, we can stay here a little longer…
© Stephanie Krellwitz