Samar Babar

“March 1, 2006” (2011)
watercolor on watercolor paper
12 x 9 in.

“One of the most difficult losses I’ve experienced was that of my mother. It was slow and painful due to the unravishing effects of cancer. By the end it had attacked her brain and she no longer even recognized who anyone was or where she was at in space or time. Her state made it difficult to properly say goodbye and so there was no sense of closure other than knowing she wasn’t in pain anymore. As an artist I longed to find a source of healing in my work but healing can’t be forced. It took me a good number of years after her passing to create something of meaning to purge my emotions.

A lot has happened in my life since her passing and time hasn’t made it any easier. In strange times like this her absence is felt even more. There isn’t any wisdom of her words or warmth of her embrace to bring me comfort. I have to navigate these circumstances my own and that often makes me feel like I’m in mourning for her all over again.

Loss changes us yes, but I don’t think we ever completely heal from it.”

artist’s website

© Samar Babar